As You Like It: Act 1, Scene 2
Enter CELIA and ROSALIND.
1I pray thee, Rosalind, sweet my coz, be
3Dear Celia, I show more mirth than I am
4mistress of; and would you yet I were merrier?
5Unless you could teach me to forget a banished
6father, you must not learn me how to remember
7any extraordinary pleasure.
8Herein I see thou lovest me not with the full
9weight that I love thee. If my uncle, thy banished
10father, had banished thy uncle, the duke my
11father, so thou hadst been still with me, I could
12have taught my love to take thy father for mine:
13so wouldst thou, if the truth of thy love to me
14were so righteously temper'd as mine is to thee.
15Well, I will forget the condition of my estate,
16to rejoice in yours.
17You know my father hath no child but I, nor
18none is like to have: and, truly, when he dies,
19thou shalt be his heir, for what he hath taken
20away from thy father perforce, I will render thee
21again in affection; by mine honour, I will; and
22when I break that oath, let me turn monster:
23therefore, my sweet Rose, my dear Rose, be merry.
24From henceforth I will, coz, and devise sports.
25Let me see; what think you of falling in love?
26Marry, I prithee, do, to make sport withal: but
27love no man in good earnest; nor no further in
28sport neither than with safety of a pure blush
29thou mayst in honour come off again.
30What shall be our sport, then?
31Let us sit and mock the good huswife Fortune
32from her wheel, that her gifts may henceforth
33be bestowed equally.
34I would we could do so, for her benefits are mightily
35misplaced, and the bountiful blind woman doth most
36mistake in her gifts to women.
37'Tis true; for those that she makes fair she scarce
38makes honest, and those that she makes honest she
39makes very ill-favouredly.
40Nay, now thou goest from Fortune's office to
41Nature's: Fortune reigns in gifts of the world,
42not in the lineaments of Nature.
Enter Clown [Touchstone].
43No? when Nature hath made a fair creature,
44may she not by Fortune fall into the fire?
45Though Nature hath given us wit to flout at
46Fortune, hath not Fortune sent in this fool
47to cut off the argument?
48Indeed, there is Fortune too hard for Nature,
49when Fortune makes Nature's natural the
50cutter-off of Nature's wit.
51Peradventure this is not Fortune's work neither,
52but Nature's; who perceiveth our natural wits
53too dull to reason of such goddesses and hath
54sent this natural for our whetstone; for always
55the dulness of the fool is the whetstone of the
56wits. How now, wit! whither wander you?
57Mistress, you must come away to your
59Were you made the messenger?
60No, by mine honour, but I was bid to come
62Where learned you that oath, fool?
63Of a certain knight that swore by his honour they
64were good pancakes and swore by his honour the
65mustard was naught: now I'll stand to it, the
66pancakes were naught and the mustard was good,
67and yet was not the knight forsworn.
68How prove you that, in the great heap of your
70Ay, marry, now unmuzzle your wisdom.
71Stand you both forth now: stroke your
72chins, and swear by your beards that I
73am a knave.
74By our beards, if we had them, thou art.
75By my knavery, if I had it, then I were; but
76if you swear by that that is not, you are not
77forsworn: no more was this knight swearing
78by his honour, for he never had any; or if he
79had, he had sworn it away before ever he saw
80those pancakes or that mustard.
81Prithee, who is't that thou meanest?
82One that old Frederick, your father, loves.
83My father's love is enough to honour him
84enough. Speak no more of him; you'll be
85whipped for taxation one of these days.
86The more pity, that fools may not speak
87wisely what wise men do foolishly.
88By my troth, thou sayest true; for since
89the little wit that fools have was silenced,
90the little foolery that wise men have makes
91a great show. Here comes Monsieur Le Beau.
Enter Le Beau.
92With his mouth full of news.
93Which he will put on us, as pigeons feed
95Then shall we be news-cramm'd.
96All the better; we shall be the more
97marketable. Bon jour, Monsieur
98Le Beau. What's the news?
99Fair princess, you have lost much good
101Sport! of what colour?
102What colour, madam! how shall I answer
104As wit and fortune will.
105Or as the Destinies decrees.
106Well said that was laid on with a trowel.
107Nay, if I keep not my rank,
108Thou losest thy old smell.
109You amaze me, ladies: I would have told
110you of good wrestling, which you have
111lost the sight of.
112You tell us the manner of the wrestling.
113I will tell you the beginning; and, if it please
114your ladyships, you may see the end; for
115the best is yet to do; and here, where you are,
116they are coming to perform it.
117Well, the beginning, that is dead and buried.
118There comes an old man and his three sons,
119I could match this beginning with an old
121Three proper young men, of excellent growth
123With bills on their necks, 'Be it known unto
124all men by these presents.'
125The eldest of the three wrestled with Charles,
126the duke's wrestler; which Charles in a
127moment threw him and broke three of his ribs,
128that there is little hope of life in him: so he
129served the second, and so the third. Yonder they
130lie; the poor old man, their father, making such
131pitiful dole over them that all the beholders
132take his part with weeping.
134But what is the sport, monsieur, that the
135ladies have lost?
136Why, this that I speak of.
137Thus men may grow wiser every day:
138it is the first time that ever I heard breaking
139of ribs was sport for ladies.
140Or I, I promise thee.
141But is there any else longs to see this broken music
142in his sides? is there yet another dotes upon
143rib-breaking? Shall we see this wrestling, cousin?
144You must, if you stay here; for here is the place
145appointed for the wrestling, and they are ready to
147Yonder, sure, they are coming: let us now stay
148and see it.
***Flourish. Enter DUKE FREDERICK, Lords,
ORLANDO, CHARLES, and Attendants.
149Come on: since the youth will not be entreated,
150his own peril on his forwardness.
151Is yonder the man?
152Even he, madam.
153Alas, he is too young! yet he looks
155How now, daughter and cousin! are
156you crept hither to see the wrestling?
157Ay, my liege, so please you give us leave.
158You will take little delight in it, I can tell
159you; there is such odds in the man. In pity
160of the challenger's youth I would fain
161dissuade him, but he will not be entreated.
162Speak to him, ladies; see if you can move him.
163Call him hither, good Monsieur Le Beau.
164Do so: I'll not be by.
165Monsieur the challenger, the princesses
166call for you.
167I attend them with all respect and duty.
168Young man, have you challenged Charles
170No, fair princess; he is the general challenger:
171I come but in, as others do, to try with him the
172strength of my youth.
173Young gentleman, your spirits are too bold for your
174years. You have seen cruel proof of this man's
175strength: if you saw yourself with your eyes or
176knew yourself with your judgment, the fear of your
177adventure would counsel you to a more equal
178enterprise. We pray you, for your own sake, to
179embrace your own safety and give over this attempt.
180Do, young sir; your reputation shall not therefore
181be misprised: we will make it our suit to the duke
182that the wrestling might not go forward.
183I beseech you, punish me not with your hard
184thoughts, wherein I confess me much guilty, to deny
185so fair and excellent ladies anything. But let
186your fair eyes and gentle wishes go with me to my
187trial: wherein if I be foiled, there is but one
188shamed that was never gracious; if killed, but one
189dead that was willing to be so: I shall do my
190friends no wrong, for I have none to lament me, the
191world no injury, for in it I have nothing; only in
192the world I fill up a place, which may be better
193supplied when I have made it empty.
194The little strength that I have, I would it were
196And mine, to eke out hers.
197Fare you well: pray heaven I be deceived in
199Your heart's desires be with you!
200Come, where is this young gallant that is
201so desirous to lie with his mother earth?
202Ready, sir; but his will hath in it a more
204You shall try but one fall.
205No, I warrant your grace, you shall not
206entreat him to a second, that have so
207mightily persuaded him from a first.
208An you mean to mock me after, you should not
209have mock'd me before: but come your ways.
210Now Hercules be thy speed, young man!
211I would I were invisible, to catch the strong
212fellow by the leg.
213O excellent young man!
214If I had a thunderbolt in mine eye, I can
215tell who should down.
Shout. [Orlando throws Charles.]
216No more, no more.
217Yes, I beseech your grace: I am not yet
219How dost thou, Charles?
220He cannot speak, my lord.
221Bear him away. What is thy name, young man?
222Orlando, my liege; the youngest son of
223Sir Rowland de Boys.
224I would thou hadst been son to some man else:
225The world esteem'd thy father honourable,
226But I did find him still mine enemy:
227Thou shouldst have better pleased me with this deed,
228Hadst thou descended from another house.
229But fare thee well; thou art a gallant youth:
230I would thou hadst told me of another father.
Exit DUKE [FREDERICK, train,
and LE BEAU].
231Were I my father, coz, would I do this?
232I am more proud to be Sir Rowland's son,
233His youngest son; and would not change that calling,
234To be adopted heir to Frederick.
235My father loved Sir Rowland as his soul,
236And all the world was of my father's mind:
237Had I before known this young man his son,
238I should have given him tears unto entreaties,
239Ere he should thus have ventured.
240Let us go thank him and encourage him:
241My father's rough and envious disposition
242Sticks me at heart. Sir, you have well deserved:
243If you do keep your promises in love
244But justly, as you have exceeded all promise,
245Your mistress shall be happy.
[Giving him her necklace.]
246Wear this for me, one out of suits with Fortune,
247That could give more, but that her hand lacks means.
248Shall we go, coz?
248Ay. Fare you well, fair gentleman.
249Can I not say, "I thank you"? My better parts
250Are all thrown down, and that which here stands up
251Is but a quintain, a mere lifeless block.
252He calls us back: my pride fell with my fortunes;
253I'll ask him what he would. Did you call, sir?
254Sir, you have wrestled well and overthrown
255More than your enemies.
255Will you go, coz?
256[To Celia] Have with you. [To Orlando] Fare you well.
Exit [Rosalind with Celia].
257What passion hangs these weights upon my tongue?
258I cannot speak to her, yet she urged conference.
259O poor Orlando, thou art overthrown!
260Or Charles or something weaker masters thee.
Enter LE BEAU.
261Good sir, I do in friendship counsel you
262To leave this place. Albeit you have deserved
263High commendation, true applause and love,
264Yet such is now the duke's condition
265That he misconstrues all that you have done.
266The duke is humorous; what he is indeed,
267More suits you to conceive than I to speak of.
268I thank you, sir: and, pray you, tell me this:
269Which of the two was daughter of the duke
270That here was at the wrestling?
271Neither his daughter, if we judge by manners;
272But yet indeed the smaller is his daughter
273The other is daughter to the banish'd duke,
274And here detain'd by her usurping uncle,
275To keep his daughter company; whose loves
276Are dearer than the natural bond of sisters.
277But I can tell you that of late this duke
278Hath ta'en displeasure 'gainst his gentle niece,
279Grounded upon no other argument
280But that the people praise her for her virtues
281And pity her for her good father's sake;
282And, on my life, his malice 'gainst the lady
283Will suddenly break forth. Sir, fare you well:
284Hereafter, in a better world than this,
285I shall desire more love and knowledge of you.
286I rest much bounden to you: fare you well.
[Exit Le Beau.]
287Thus must I from the smoke into the smother;
288From tyrant duke unto a tyrant brother:
289But heavenly Rosalind!