As You Like It: Act 3, Scene 3
Enter Clown [TOUCHSTONE], AUDREY;
and JAQUES [behind].
TOUCHSTONE
1
Come apace, good Audrey: I will 2
fetch up your goats, Audrey. And 3
how, Audrey? am I the man yet? 4. my simple feature: my plain appearance.
4
doth my simple feature content you?
AUDREY
5. warrant: protect. 5-6. what / features?: Audrey is a simple country girl with no education, so it is hard to tell just what alarms her about the word feature. She may think feature means "teacher," "pasture," or "creature."
5
Your features! Lord warrant us! what 6
features?
TOUCHSTONE
7-9. I am here . . . among the Goths: Touchstone here makes a multi-witticism . . .
10. ill-inhabited: i.e., inappropriately housed in lowly lodgings. 11. Jove in a thatched house: Ovid, in his Metamorphoses, tells how Jupiter and Mercury . . .
10. ill-inhabited: i.e., inappropriately housed in lowly lodgings. 11. Jove in a thatched house: Ovid, in his Metamorphoses, tells how Jupiter and Mercury . . .
7
I am here with thee and thy goats, 8
as the most capricious poet, honest 9
Ovid, was among the Goths.
JAQUES [Aside.]
10
O knowledge ill-inhabited, worse 11
than Jove in a thatched house!
TOUCHSTONE
12
When a man's verses cannot be understood, 13. seconded: aided. forward: Well-advanced for one's years, precocious.
13
nor a man's good wit seconded with the forward 14
child Understanding, it strikes a man more 15. great reckoning in a little room: i.e., high bill in a lowly tavern.
15
dead than a great reckoning in a little room. 16
Truly, I would the gods had made thee poetical.
AUDREY
17. honest: honorable, true.
17
I do not know what 'poetical' is: is it honest in 18
deed and word? is it a true thing?
TOUCHSTONE
19
No, truly; for the truest poetry is the most20. feigning: 1) imaginative or inventive 2) pretending or lying.
20
feigning; and lovers are given to poetry, 21
and what they swear in poetry may be said 22
as lovers they do feign.
AUDREY
23
Do you wish then that the gods had made 24
me poetical?
TOUCHSTONE
25
I do, truly; for thou swearest to me thou art26. honest: chaste.
26
honest: now, if thou wert a poet, I might 27
have some hope thou didst feign.
AUDREY
28
Would you not have me honest?
TOUCHSTONE
29. wert hard-favoured: were ugly.
29
No, truly, unless thou wert hard-favoured; 30
for honesty coupled to beauty is to have 31
honey a sauce to sugar.
JAQUES [Aside.]
32. material: full of "matter," good sense.
32
A material fool!
AUDREY
33. fair: beautiful.
33
Well, I am not fair; and therefore I pray 34
the gods make me honest.
TOUCHSTONE
35
Truly, and to cast away honesty upon 36. foul: ugly.
36
a foul slut were to put good meat into 37
an unclean dish.
AUDREY
38
I am not a slut, though I thank the gods 39
I am foul.
TOUCHSTONE
40
Well, praised be the gods for thy foulness! 41
sluttishness may come hereafter. But be it as 42
it may be, I will marry thee, and to that end 43. Sir: courtesy title for a priest. Martext: His last name suggests that Sir Oliver is ignorant of the holy texts that he is supposed to teach and preach.
43
I have been with Sir Oliver Martext, the vicar 44
of the next village, who hath promised to meet 45
me in this place of the forest and to couple us.
JAQUES [Aside.]
46
I would fain see this meeting.
AUDREY
47
Well, the gods give us joy!
TOUCHSTONE
48
Amen. A man may, if he were of a fearful heart,49. stagger: hesitate, waver. attempt: undertaking.
50-51. But what / though?: But what of that?
51. horns are odious: Horns are odious because they grow on the foreheads of cuckolds . . . 52. necessary: inevitable. 52-53. many a man knows no end of / his goods: i.e., many a man thinks his wealth is inexhaustible. 54. dowry: the wealth that a wife brings into a marriage. 55. getting: earning; begetting.
50-51. But what / though?: But what of that?
51. horns are odious: Horns are odious because they grow on the foreheads of cuckolds . . . 52. necessary: inevitable. 52-53. many a man knows no end of / his goods: i.e., many a man thinks his wealth is inexhaustible. 54. dowry: the wealth that a wife brings into a marriage. 55. getting: earning; begetting.
49
stagger in this attempt; for here we have no temple 50
but the wood, no assembly but horn-beasts. But what 51
though? Courage! As horns are odious, they are 52
necessary. It is said, 'many a man knows no end of 53
his goods:' right; many a man has good horns, and 54
knows no end of them. Well, that is the dowry of 55
his wife; 'tis none of his own getting. Horns? 56
Even so. Poor men alone? No, no; the noblest deer57. rascal: lean, worthless deer.
57
hath them as huge as the rascal. Is the single man 58
therefore blessed? No: as a walled town is more 59
worthier than a village, so is the forehead of a 60
married man more honourable than the bare brow 61-63. by how much defence is better / than no skill, by so much is a horn more precious / than to want: i.e., as it is better to be on guard against losing what you have than to be indifferent, so it is better to have a cuckold's horn than . . .
65. dispatch us: finish off our business, i.e., marry us.
65. dispatch us: finish off our business, i.e., marry us.
61
of a bachelor; and by how much defence is better 62
than no skill, by so much is a horn more precious 63
than to want. Here comes Sir Oliver.
Enter SIR OLIVER MARTEXT.
64
Sir Oliver Martext, you are well met: will you 65
dispatch us here under this tree, or shall we go 66
with you to your chapel?
SIR OLIVER MARTEXT
67
Is there none here to give the woman?
TOUCHSTONE
68
I will not take her on gift of any man.
SIR OLIVER MARTEXT
69
Truly, she must be given, or the marriage 70
is not lawful.
JAQUES [Coming Forward.]
71
Proceed, proceed I'll give her.
TOUCHSTONE
72
Good even, good Master What-ye-call't: 73. You are very well met: i.e., it's good that you are here. 74. God 'ild you for your last company: God reward you for the last time you kept company with me . . . 75-76. even a toy / in hand here: it's just a trifling matter that is underway here. nay, pray be covered: i.e., no, [you don't need to take off your hat to me], please put your hat on. Of course, Jaques hasn't doffed his hat, and wouldn't doff his hat to anyone; Touchstone is slyly making fun of Jaques' pomposity.
73
how do you, sir? You are very well met: 74
God 'ild you for your last company: 75
I am very glad to see you: even a toy 76
in hand here, sir: nay, pray be covered.
JAQUES
77
Will you be married, motley?
TOUCHSTONE
78-80. bow: yoke. curb: the strap attached to a horse's bridle under the jaw. The oxen's bow, the horse's curb, and the falcon's bells are all used to control the animal, so Touchstone seems to be saying that we are controlled by our desires.
78
As the ox hath his bow, sir, the horse 79
his curb and the falcon her bells, so 80
man hath his desires; and as pigeons 81
bill, so wedlock would be nibbling.
JAQUES
82
And will you, being a man of your 83
breeding, be married under a bush like 84
a beggar? Get you to church, and have 85-86. can tell you what marriage is: can instruct you in the responsibilities of marriage.
85
a good priest that can tell you what 86
marriage is: this fellow will but join 87
you together as they join wainscot; 88
then one of you will prove a shrunk 89
panel and, like green timber, warp, warp.
TOUCHSTONE [Aside.]
90. I am not in the mind but I were better: i.e., I think it might be better for me.
90
I am not in the mind but I were better to 91
be married of him than of another: for he 92
is not like to marry me well; and not being 93
well married, it will be a good excuse for 94
me hereafter to leave my wife.
JAQUES
95
Go thou with me, and let me counsel thee.
TOUCHSTONE
96
Come, sweet Audrey:97. married: i.e., properly married in church, by a qualified priest. live in bawdry: i.e., live in a state of fornication.
97
We must be married, or we must live in bawdry. 98
Farewell, good Master Oliver: not,99. 'O sweet Oliver . . . :. Scholars agree that at least some of these lines are from a ballad current in Shakespeare's time.
99
'O sweet Oliver,100
O brave Oliver,101
Leave me not behind thee;' 102
but,103. Wind: wander, go.
103
'Wind away,104
Begone, I say,105
I will not to wedding with thee.'
[Exeunt JAQUES, TOUCHSTONE
and AUDREY.]
SIR OLIVER MARTEXT
106. fantastical: full of ridiculous notions.
106
'Tis no matter: ne'er a fantastical knave of 107
them all shall flout me out of my calling.
Exit.